Socialist Worker

The things they say

Issue No. 2703

‘Wonderful news. Many congratulations to Boris Johnson and Carrie Symonds’

Labour leader Keir Starmer gushes his congrats to Johnson after he becomes a father for the [insert figure] time

‘How comforting it was to finally have some happy news’

The Telegraph feels better after the birth

‘We will have to wait to find out if those fair strands of baby hair turn into the blonde thatch for which his father has long been famous’

The Telegraph is over-excited

‘It is not yet clear what colour Wilfred’s eyes are’

The Daily Express finds something else for us to be on the edge of our seats over

‘A strategy to deal with a ‘death of Stalin’ type scenario’

Boris Johnson describes his time being ill

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