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Ukip bigots fall out in latest episode of racist soap opera

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Issue 2547
Douglas Carswell at Ukips spring conference in Margate in 2015
Douglas Carswell at Ukip’s spring conference in Margate in 2015 (Pic: Guy Smallman)

The racist Ukip party has no MPs following last week’s resignation of Douglas Carswell. It’s the latest instalment in the ongoing saga that is Ukip.

The crisis follows months of public rows. Former leader Nigel Farage isn’t too keen on Carswell, a Tory defector, because he isn’t nasty enough about migrants.

But Farage claimed that having no MPs isn’t a problem and soothed himself with the Tories’ woes over Brexit.

Or as he put it, “Winning a war is very, very important, but you also have to win the peace.

“The peace is far from won. Already I can see concessions being made over fishing.”

Current leader Paul Nuttall isn’t bothered by Carswell’s departure either. He sniffed that Ukip had not benefitted “financially or organisationally” from having Carswell as an MP.

“His departure will make no difference,” Nuttall said. And on the positive side, it shows how successful Nuttall’s promise to “forge unity” in the party has been.

All the same, Farage vowed to write to every voter in Clacton to see if 20 percent would back a by-election.

He had hoped that major donor—although apparently not currently a member—Arron Banks could challenge Carswell for the seat. But Banks is becoming a problem too.

He gave £1 million to Ukip in the run-up to the 2015 general election.

He has now sent Ukip an invoice demanding £200,000 for services he gave the party for free and said he wants to set up a new movement.

Carswell claimed he was leaving Ukip because, with the vote to leave the European Union, “we won”. It’s a funny kind of winning.

Ukip faces bankruptcy—and Carswell’s departure means it will lose up to £217,000 a year more.

This “short money” is available to opposition parties with at least two MPs or one MP and more than 150,000 votes at the last general election.

Ukip now meets neither criteria.

Racist wants to Peer at dodgy website

Ukip hasn’t lost everything in Westminster—it still has the odious Lord Pearson.

He has been campaigning unsuccessfully for access to a website blocked by Parliament because it propagates “hate” and “racism”.

The former Ukip leader submitted a written question on 14 March to ask how the Parliamentary Digital Service catergorises websites.

He asked, “Why there are no plans to unblock the ‘Religion of Peace’ website.”

The anonymously-run site states that it was established to “explain the threat that Islam truly poses to human dignity and freedom”.

Suffragettes in the Conservative club

A Tory social club must pay out £35,000 after sexists allegedly branded women members a “witch” and a “cow”—and prevented them joining the committee.

Three women were awarded £3,000 damages after a legal challenge against the Blackpool Tory club.

One committee man said women would never serve on the committee “as long as he had a hole in his arse”.Irene James, said, “Before all of this we had to behave like Stepford Wives. It’s fine if you toe the line but they don’t like it if you speak out.

“They want you at home making food and behaving like women.

“Some of the women who go in there are all downtrodden—we’re not like that.

“Most members are not talking to us now. I won a raffle and someone shouted, ‘Haven’t you taken enough out of this club?’

“We are going against the grain and are the modern day suffragettes.”

The killer weapon’s name is a big secret

Defence secretary Sir Michael Fallon has stepped in to ensure that the reason Britain’s Predator drone has been renamed as “Protector drone” remains a secret.

Fallon announced a £100 million contract with US arms firm General Atomics in December to launch a ?eet of killer drones with the nice name of “Protector”.

This was odd given that back in July General Atomics had announced at the Farnborough International Airshow that it was supplying the RAF with a version of its “Predator B” drones.

So when did Predators become Protectors?

The MOD ruled that revealing the rebranding secrets would “prejudice the effective conduct of public affairs”, and claimed that to “release this information… would be counter to the public interest”.

To use this excuse of secrecy, the Freedom of Information rules say the ministry needs the say-so of a “quali?ed person”.

In this case, the defence minister Michael Fallon.

Coke copper fills his boots

A crooked police inspector found with £750,000 of seized drugs at his home has been jailed for 26 years. The same amount of time he was a cop.

Keith Boots was responsible for destroying confiscated drugs but instead gave them to his son to put back on the streets.

He was spotted taking cocaine from a store and when officers raided his home in 2014 they found the fireplace, washing machine and fridge stuffed with heroin, cannabis, ecstasy and crack cocaine.

Boots was convicted of theft of drugs, possession with intent to supply and conspiring to pervert justice.

Cameron’s cover-up over Uber

David Cameron is accused of a cover-up over failed plans to regulate the Uber car hire firm. Together with George Osborne they got aides to lobby then London Tory mayor Boris Johnson against curbs on the taxi giant. Rachel Whetstone, a senior vice-president at Uber, is a friend of Cameron and Osborne.

And Blackstone, which gave Osborne a nice job, owns rather a lot of Uber.

Nuclear weapons not safe?

AWE Management Ltd has acquired two more safety improvement notices from the Office for Nuclear Regulation.

The ONR found alarming evidence of “a disproportionate emphasis on reducing the burden of health and safety on the business”—reassuring, especially for those minding nuclear weapons.

In their own words

‘I have about 16,000 followers, all of whom hate me’

Tory MP for Shipley Philip Davies, best known for talking for almost an hour and a half to try and stop legislation against domestic violence, understands social media

‘It’s not somebody’s fault to be born into a grand family’

Princess Josephine zu Loewenstein-Wertheim-Freudenberg says snobbery works both ways

‘The picture is of Boris trying to get out of a very tight seating area against the wall in the restaurant’

Spokesperson explains reports of David Cameron and Boris Jonson standing on chairs and dancing in a New York restaurant

‘Wills cheats death: Prince’s helicopter horror as a lethal drone comes within HALF A SECOND of his air ambulance’

The Daily Mail newspaper breathlessly reports how Prince William avoided dying in a helicopter that didn’t crash and he wasn’t in fact on


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